5/7/10 - Pointlessly Impressive/ Impressively Pointless.

Today I went for a wander around Shanghai with Rick the token Australian on our tour. We visited the People's Park (they like names like this) which was a pleasant enough place. Here we were acosted by a group of students wishing to practice their English. I don't think they'd counted on Rick though. The man can hold every side of a 6-way conversation.

Once they had fled in abject terror (lucky sods) we continued on to the Shanghai Museum. It was an interesting enough museum (I'd recommend avoiding the seal* section though). The iron section was my favourite. They could get remarkable ammounts of detail into their work.

In the evening most of us went to see an acrobatics show. The acts varied from very impressive to very impressive but you've wasted your life learning that. Some skills just do not look good no matter how hard you work to learn them. Seriously, I don't care how many plates you're spinning, that guy just did a triple backflip through a hoop higher than I am.

My favourite act thought so much of itself that they had to give themselves a handicap (it was to Celine Dion's The Heart Will Go On) just to make it fair to the other acts. Two people messing around with two long pieces of cloth coming from the ceiling, using them to fly around the place. It looked great fun.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7w-4vQWBsOU

That is an example of it though not quite as impressive and with a less cheesy soundtrack.

The final act was also good. They had a large, spherical, metal cage in which they put increasing numbers of motorbike riders answering that age old question of how many motorcyclists can you fit in a giant metal sphere. Five apparently.

*The stamps, not the animals**.

**Unless you think they're interchangeable, you monster.

4/7/10 - The Floor is Lava!

Once more I stepped out of an airconditioned room and had my glasses instantly steam up. There is a possibility that this'll happen for the rest of the trip...

We spent the morning wandering Zitang again before catching a bus back to Shanghai. It is an impressive city and I like it considerably more than Beijing. I still find the lack of what I consider common courtesy (as well as the homicidal nature of the drivers; pedestrian crossings are merely targets) odd. People can collide with you, hit you with bags or umbrellas without saying a work or even look apologetic. I watched dozens of people pass a woman struggling to get her luggage up some stairs before I reached her and helped out. People will force their way past without saying "excuse me" or the equivalent and you can forget about queueing.

They are nice enough people when you talk to them though, and I am enjoying my time here. It is just the most different place I've been culture wise.

On a lighter note, we were walking down a busy street when a few drops of water hit the ground. Anyone familiar with the game "the floor is lava!" will have an idea of what the next part looked like. Suddenly people were screaming and there was a mass exodus towards shop doorways (which I of course followed). A few seconds later and some of the heaviest rain I've ever seen started falling. Even with our umbrellas up in testudo formation the rain splashing from the pavement drenched us up to our knees. Salespeople appeared with umbrellas of course.

3/7/10 - From a Postion of Power?

We arrived at Shanghai today. I stepped off the train and my glasses immediately steamed up. It was incredibly humid. Thankfully we were heading straight to Zitang.

Not before a thunderstorm hit us of course. Rick held to his principles as he bargained over the price of an umbrella while getting absolutely drenched.

One bus journey later and we were in Zitang where is was ludicrously humid but not raining. We got to our hostel via rickshaw; the only way to travel. China continued with its relentless torrent of stupid bathrooms, this time having the entire room being a shower with the added bonus of no working light. Fun times ensued.

This town is described as the Venice of China, and it is very pleasant.

Some of MI3 was filmed here apparently. Never saw the film.

The day ended with some of us in a bar watching Germany decimate Argentina.

2/7/10 - Cats.

Nothing much happened today other than the beginning of the sleeper train journey to Shanghai. We played Euchre.

For Tuomo I post this:

... and for the sake of it I post this:

1/7/10 - Mecha Terracotta Warrior.

I finally got to see the Terracotta Army today.

They have only excavated a small portion of what exists and it is still very impressive. There are about 8000 warriors apparently and they've only uncovered about 1000.

Progress is slowed by the desire to avoid oxidation that ruins the colouring of the soldiers.

Each of the soldiers is unique, but my favourite is mecha terracotta warrior, who was clearly only ever deployed in times of desparate need.

Also of note today is that I learned to play the card game Euchre. We have a 17 hour train journey coming up...

30/6/10 - And Safe.

I'll admit that after the huge overcrowding, horrible sales approach and polution filled skies I was not particularly impressed with Beijing and was worried that the rest of China would follow suit. It came as a relief to find that Xi'an was more to my liking. Far less crowded (though still having a population greater than that of Scotland) and with visible blue sky and more laid back sales people I was much happier here.

After settling into our hostel, which has our first sensible bathroom of the stay*, a group of us went to the city wall and hired bikes to ride around the top of it. An enjoyable if very hot time.

In the evening we tried Dim Sum which turns out to be exceptionally average, before heading over to see Asia's biggest musical water fountain show. This was immense fun as you can wander into the fountains and get completely drenched. I have videos, but uploading them here would take an age.

*Having the shower be the entire bathroom is stupid. All you end up with is a very wet toilet.

29/6/10 - Hard Sleeper.

We headed back to Beijing today to catch our hard sleeper class train to Xi'an. The train was in the evening so we went to explore the Silk Market in the afternoon.

A ten storey building full of Chinese salespeople is my new idea of hell.

The continuous yelling and grabbing as well as the ridiculous nature of the bargaining (they usually start at at least ten times what the product is worth) was not something I enjoyed.

I was glad when we finally caught our very basic overnight train.

28/6/10 - There Are Four Lights.

Today was the Great Wall. I'd been looking forwards to this for a long time, and was delighted to find that we were on a nearly empty section of the wall. Well, empty save for the salespeople...

I'll leave the pictures to show how cool the actual wall is, and instead focus on my experience with one old woman, who nearly broke my mind.

In South America wherever you went there were generally people trying to sell you things. They have nothing on the persitence or sheer insane annoyance that the Chinese have mastered in this respect. If they hadn't been there the wall would have been absolutely magnificent as opposed to just great. I shall try to recall the conversation I had with one of them as they followed us along the whole bleedin' wall.

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: You buy sovenir.

Mark: No thankyou.

Mark's Head: No thankyou.

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: Later.

Mark: No thanks.

Mark's Head: Persistent, I'll give them that.

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: Later.

Mark: No thankyou.

Mark's Head: Uh-oh.

Sales attempt 20...

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: You buy t-shirt.

Mark: No thankyou.

Mark's Head: There is no possible situation under which I will ever buy anything from you.

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: Later.

Mark: No thankyou.

Mark's Head: Buy a dictionary crazy lady!

Sales attempt 50...

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: You buy postcards.

Mark: No thankyou.

Mark's Head: Is drop kicking old women frowned upon in China?

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: Later.

Mark: No thankyou.

Mark's Head: I WILL END YOU DEVIL WOMAN!

Sales attempt 100...

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: You buy book.

Mark: No thankyou.

Mark's Head: Keep it together Mark, you're a grown man, you can't cry.

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: Later.

Mark: No thankyou.

Mark's Head: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

Sales attempt 1014...

Astoundingly annoying saleswoman: You buy fan.

Mark: ...

Mark's Head: Fwibble.

27/6/10 - Priorities.

Tomorrow we are going to walk part of the Great Wall of China so we needed to buy our lunch for the day. It was here that Sam demonstrated his ability to get his point across by gesticulating wildly. Some actions clearly surpass all language barriers.

For our lunch today, however, we went to a nearby restaurant and came across another of my complaints about China. For their meat dishes I think they just throw the whole animal into a grinder. There are bones in everything.

At night a smaller group of us went to see a kung fu show. Unfortunately photogrpahs and film are not allowed (they want to sell you the DVD) but it was very enjoyable.

26/6/10 - So Now I'm In China.

First up, went for breakfast in a bakery where I had cake wrapped in pastry. Sometimes I wonder how I have failed to come up with things like this myself.

Afterwards we headed off to the Forbidden City, which is in no way forbidden. In fact it was absolutely mobbed. I'm hoping the rest of China isn't like this.

The buildings here are very impressive looking, and the grounds are massive.

The gardens are nice too.

Next we went to Tiamen Square. It is a big square with not much in it, save for some statues and some video screens proclaiming China's awesomeness.

Back at the hostel I passed this sign which reminded me of what I hated most about South America.

"You have money and we'll do anything to get it," is a really crap mentality to have.

A nearby bell tower was my last tourist spot for the day where we got a glorious panoramic view of the smog that engulfs Beijing. I've never seen such polution before. It is terrible.

In the evening I went out with the group to try Peking duck. It is just duck. I don't know what people expect, really, there is only one state of being a duck as far as I'm aware. You're either a duck, or you're not. Regardless, the rest of the meal was excellent. Over here you buy may different dishes, put them on a rotating platform in the center of the table and then pick and choose what you want.

Finally we visited the night market where there are many stalls selling weird and wonderful stuff, before heading back to the bar at the hostel.